“It is me, in the flesh,
touch my hands…”
8th May 1953
It was night and I was praying before the Blessed Sacrament, more with my heart than with my lips, always tormented with the doubt of being deceiving myself. Suddenly, I saw before me my sweet Mother Mary shrouded in light, just like the other times. She approached me and said with a smile:
“My little one, courage, do not be afraid. Your Mother cannot deceive anyone: it is me, in the flesh . Touch my hands: I am a human being like you, even if I come from Heaven. It is the Lord who has given me this mission for the sake of all my children who live on earth.
Speak to the priest whom you wish to ask for as a confessor, as you like: I allow you! You will see, he will understand that it is me who speaks to you.
My enemy wants to torment you and prevent me, your mother, from giving this gift for the good and salvation of souls. Speak without fear and believe what he will tell you”.
“Please, Mother, forgive my doubts. I know you are so good, but, aware of my poverty and littleness, I am always uncertain of myself”.
“I repeat, don't fear! Be at peace. I bless you”.
What a joy and peace my sweet Mother left in my heart this time too!
I THINK IT IS REALLY HER,
20th June 1953
In June I decided to ask, out of pity, to be allowed to confess with the priest of whom I spoke. After a few days he came and I reported with simplicity what the angel of the Lord had said to me both the first and the second time. The confessor thought for a moment and then asked me:
“What did you lie about?”
Then I took courage and confided all that our Heavenly Mother had said to me, what she wanted of me and the torment that I had had within me for three years for fear of being deceived.
He thought for a while . He asked me some questions and then said:
“I think it is really Our Lady who is appearing to you and who wants to bring to conclusion what Jesus asked of sister Consolata Betrone. Be at peace. I say this in the name of God”.
So I gathered my courage and asked:
“That young man who says he is the angel of the Lord, said that he would return again. He frightens me so much! How should I behave?” He replied:
“Listen to what he tells you. If you see that he insists on trying to make you admit that you lied, take Holy Water and sprinkle him saying:” In the name of God and the blessed Virgin Mary, leave this room. Then you will be able to tell me how he behaved, so as to understand if it is Satan or the angel of the Lord”.
The words of the priest gave me peace and serenity. However this serenity was soon disturbed by the one who said he was the angel of the Lord.
THE ANGEL OF DARKNESS
One night I had just gone to bed and was praying. At a certain point I heard a little noise in the cell, but did not pay much attention. After a short time I felt as if a hand had been placed on my head. I was shocked. I stretched out my arm to turn on the light, but could not find it.
I became frightened. Whilst I was there uncertain of what to do, I heard the voice of the youth whom I had seen the last two times. He said to me:
“Do not be afraid, it is me, the angel of the Lord”.
Then I looked: it was indeed him. He continued:
“Fear not, I have come for your own good. Why did you not listen to me? Be good, listen to my advice, otherwise you will repent, when it will be too late. If you continue in this way, you will do nothing but deceive! Confess that this story was all an illusion of yours and do not think any longer about these things”.
Whilst I was uncertain and filled with fear, I remembered what the priest had told me. I wanted to get the Holy Water that I had on the bedside table, but I was afraid. So I took the crucifix that I always wore on my chest and raising it I said:
“In the name of Christ and of the Immaculate Virgin, out of here”.
He made a grimace and with a severe voice said:
“May you and who suggested these things to you be cursed: you will pay for this. If it were not for Her, I would strangle you!”
He became like a burning coal and fled leaving a trail of fire behind him, that remained for a few moments.
You can imagine, Father of my soul, the terror I felt.
The fear that everything that had passed between me and my dear Mother was really an illusion of mine gripped me even more strongly. What a torment! I was unable to sleep out of fear. So I decided to call that priest again and tell him everything. After he had listened to me, he said:
“This is the rage of the devil! Now I am even more convinced that the Blessed Virgin Mary has really spoken to you in order to give that gift of hers to mankind, as a sign of Her motherly love for the salvation of souls. Do not be afraid”.
“Father, I fear so much!”
“No, be at peace. I assure you that Our Lady will not permit Satan to harm you. Are you not in her Heart?”
“Yes, father, but help me, because I feel so small and poor”.
He replied: “Have confidence and live your total abandon in Her, who loves you with maternal heart and tenderness”.
THROWS OFF HIS MASK
At that time one of the two dormitories was in danger of collapsing because of displaced beams and therefore we all had to gather into the other and agreed to sleep in twos per cell, with a small curtain to separate the beds.
It was here that the heaviest blow fell. That night I was already in bed, so was the other sister and it seemed to me that she was already asleep.
I do not know why, but I was unable to sleep. After about an hour I heard my name being called by a voice that frightened me by saying:
“Here I am. Now I will get back at you!”
I opened my eyes and saw in front of me that youth who said he was the angel of the Lord. Only God knows how I got scared! Only God knows (… ) He showed that he wanted to come closer to my bed (…).
I do not know, my dear father, if you can imagine what I experienced!. Running away was not possible. What an anguish I felt within me! I thought I was lost and unintentionally began to call for help.
The sister awoked asking me if I felt ill. She came closer to my bed immediately. Seeing me trembling with fear she asked me: “What's the matter?”
I replied to her: “For goodness sake, please sprinkle holy water because the devil is here. Beg the blessed Virgin Mary to send this monster away from me, I feel like dying!”
The poor sister began to make signs of the cross with holy water and pray the Hail Mary. I cannot explain what took place. I know that the youth changed to a repugnant monster and fled screaming, shaking the room.
The sister who slept in the same room, asked whether she had seen anything, replied:
“No, but I felt that something was taking place that I was unable to explain”.
Please forgive me, father of my soul, if I have reported all this. I have done violence to my feelings only in order to obey (…).